In a word: Gre_ _e is the word. The specs: #0474   Address, hours & details via Isthmus ; reviews at Yelp , , EatDrinkMadison listing; official web site . Bill B . ate the pork souvlaki. JM ate the Hercules plate (chicken, pork and gyro). John ate the pitza and a Wisconsin Amber. Judith ate the chicken kabob. Nichole ate the classic gyro. We split some cheese fries and yogurt. The bill was about $60. Nichole gave Parthenon Gyros a C+; JM gave Parthenon Gyros a C; Bill and Judith gave Parthenon Gyros a C-; John gave Parthenon Gyros a D. Since we didn't go at bartime, we might have missed the point of Parthenon. We're clearly not in their target college demographic, but it was hard to get a read on that since the place was nearly abandoned at six on a Monday night. The staff had a teasing collegiality that spoke volumes about how often they needed to amuse themselves during long bouts of downtime. Once we got up to the roof garden and took our first few bites, the fresh air and good company outshone the actual food, though a 30-watt incandescent lightbulb would also have done the trick but that wouldn't have been nearly as much fun. The classic gyro was stacked high with standard meat, an obnoxious surfeit of mild onions, and a few slices of tomatoes of wildly varying quality (some ripe, some pink, some incompletely cored.) The Hercules plate provided a sample of pork and chicken as well as lamb.  The meat was warm but not really tasty, just sort of greasy and bland.  The lamb was probably the star though that's like saying that Lorenzo Lamas was the star of Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus . Technically true, but you shouldn't care. The best find of all was no doubt the yogurt, which was made in-house. For $3.22, you can get a pint of fresh, intensely zingy yogurt. With a dab of honey, it was perfect for cutting the grease between bites and would probably make an excellent ingredient in a salad dressing or smoothie. Poor John and Judith got the short end of the stick, trying to explore the offbeat parts of the menu. The “pitza” was, well, a broiled pita pizza, with mozzarella, feta, and a few small chunks of meat. It was hard to eat and just didn't taste very good. As John opined, “If you eat only one Greek pizza this year, you're lucky.” The cheese fries were no consolation, as they congealed fast and weren't a good value compared to the regular fry basket. Bill and John remembered Parthenon being busy all the time, but given the lull we wonder if it's just a bartime draw these days. One thing's for sure, Parthenon's reality pales to collegiate memories.

In a word: Gre_ _e is the word. The specs: #0474   Address, hours & details via Isthmus ; reviews at Yelp , , EatDrinkMadison listing; official web site . Bill B . ate the pork souvlaki. JM ate the Hercules plate (chicken, pork and gyro). John ate the pitza and a Wisconsin Amber. Judith ate the chicken kabob. Nichole ate the classic gyro. We split some cheese fries and yogurt. The bill was about $60. Nichole gave Parthenon Gyros a C+; JM gave Parthenon Gyros a C; Bill and Judith gave Parthenon Gyros a C-; John gave Parthenon Gyros a D. Since we didn't go at bartime, we might have missed the point of Parthenon. We're clearly not in their target college demographic, but it was hard to get a read on that since the place was nearly abandoned at six on a Monday night. The staff had a teasing collegiality that spoke volumes about how often they needed to amuse themselves during long bouts of downtime. Once we got up to the roof garden and took our first few bites, the fresh air and good company outshone the actual food, though a 30-watt incandescent lightbulb would also have done the trick but that wouldn't have been nearly as much fun. The classic gyro was stacked high with standard meat, an obnoxious surfeit of mild onions, and a few slices of tomatoes of wildly varying quality (some ripe, some pink, some incompletely cored.) The Hercules plate provided a sample of pork and chicken as well as lamb.  The meat was warm but not really tasty, just sort of greasy and bland.  The lamb was probably the star though that's like saying that Lorenzo Lamas was the star of Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus . Technically true, but you shouldn't care. The best find of all was no doubt the yogurt, which was made in-house. For $3.22, you can get a pint of fresh, intensely zingy yogurt. With a dab of honey, it was perfect for cutting the grease between bites and would probably make an excellent ingredient in a salad dressing or smoothie. Poor John and Judith got the short end of the stick, trying to explore the offbeat parts of the menu. The “pitza” was, well, a broiled pita pizza, with mozzarella, feta, and a few small chunks of meat. It was hard to eat and just didn't taste very good. As John opined, “If you eat only one Greek pizza this year, you're lucky.” The cheese fries were no consolation, as they congealed fast and weren't a good value compared to the regular fry basket. Bill and John remembered Parthenon being busy all the time, but given the lull we wonder if it's just a bartime draw these days. One thing's for sure, Parthenon's reality pales to collegiate memories.

In a word: Comfort, served warm and cheap. The specs: #0441  Address, hours & details via Isthmus ; Madison Originals profile , reviews at , Yelp , EatDrinkMadison listing. Alan ate the fish fry. JM ate the mac and cheese with Polish sausage and a lemonade. Mallory ate the Greek omelet and a soda. Nichole ate the chicken noodle soup, a Monte Cristo and coffee. We split some tapioca pudding and a slice of lemon meringue pie. The bill was $46 plus tip. JM gave Parkway Family Restaurant an B+ ; Nichole gave Parkway Family Restaurant an A. With the economic times what they are, Parkway has recently garnered some attention as a place for a good bargain on homestyle food, but that's not news. Parkway was one of the places Nichole and JM went during their first summer in Madison; back then, they were still easily charmed by smoother faces and Parkway seemed shabby, almost something to be ashamed of feeling affection toward. In contrast to a Food Fight joint, where $4 got you a fake smile and a side of mashed yams, at Parkway Nichole's cashier pay easily afforded a plate of scallops (nevermind if they really were) and a side of Brewtown nostalgia. Today a meal will run you more like $7 or $8 but the place is still real. We think it's too bad it's taken harder times for Parkway to get what recognition it deserves, but we're glad it's starting to happen. Anyway. Of the Monte Cristo : Bread: The French toast was made from very eggy, thick cut white bread. The top was soggier than the bottom. Meat: The ham and turkey were warmed through, medium-thick cut. Cheese: Swiss, exceedingly goopy and generous, but possibly processed versus the harder stuff. Construction/presentation: The flavors were balanced, but the sandwich was basically too big and heavy to finish. Maple syrup was provided on request. About a 6 of 10 overall. Mallory got her usual, the Greek omelet; we gather she could have said “the usual” to our server and she would have gotten the right thing. It's that kind of place. The omelet spilled off the plate and was cooked perfectly, with fresh tomatoes, feta, and peppers. The side of hashbrowns were lightly cooked and not too greasy. Alan's fish fry included a trip to the salad bar, which offered a few dozen choices of toppings and standard sides like cottage cheese, radishes, carrots, nuts, etc. The fish itself was better than average, flaky and hot, with a light breading and a baked potato with the trimmings on the side. JM gave in to his heart and got the mac and cheese. A big serving of elbow macaroni, garnished with parsley, in a cheesy sauce with many visible bits of carrots and onion. While this execution was neither as tasty nor as memorable as the one at the Old Fashioned , it was perfect comfort food at a very comfortable price. Warm and satisfying, even the Polish sausage implied “home” to JM, nevermind that he didn't grow up eating it split and fried in this particular way. No dinner at a family restaurant is complete without something from the rotating display case and/or tapioca/jello. The serving of pudding was presented prettily, and about twice the portion as usual. The pudding was light on tapioca pearls and had a good vanilla flavor. The lemon meringue pie was very good and zesty. Yes, friends, the Parkway is not a place to go in order to “be seen” in the right place. It is not where you go when you want to “wow” a first date. But for good food at a price you can live with, Parkway is way towards the top.

In a word: Low-rent in an awesome way. The specs: #0472   Address, hours & details via Isthmus ; reviews at Yelp , , Eat Drink Madison ; MySpace page . JM ate the grilled ham and cheese and a lemonade. Nichole ate the Paradise burger with a PBR. We split some cheese balls. The bill was $18 plus tip. JM and Nichole gave Paradise Lounge an A-. This was our first visit to the 'Dise, and it was nigh empty of a Thursday night at 8. There were a few regulars at the bar telling stories loudly and doing wifi tech support (”There shouldn't be a password. Just get on the Frequency's. Or try Shamrock's.”) We slid into a wooden 2-person booth just across from the bar and JM made Nichole order up. We shared a basket of cheese balls, basically tater-tot shaped curds served with ranch dressing which, if anything, were a little less fun than average. JM broke his ham and cheese fast with this impossibly salty and greasy and incredibly warm and delicious sandwich. It was good to have a comfort meal after two days of travel in the land of the gagga. Each sandwich basket was stocked with ample dill pickle chips. Nichole's Paradise Burger stacked up on Kate's burger rating guide : Bun: very buttery and toasted; round, soft on top. Meat: large yet thick patty. Bun/meat ratio: perfect. Cheese: supposedly pepper jack but conspicuously absent. Misc.: Bacon ample; tomato and lettuce there just for superfluous crunch. 6.5 of 10 overall. While missing cheese on a cheeseburger might normally be cause for docked points, Nichole's not docking anything from the bartender who made our food. JM noticed that he seemed to have injured his hand (in the bloody sense) while cooking and took a second to bandage it up. Nichole had missed the action (checking out the very divey restroom) and when she returned JM reported the incident, capping it off with, “Well, it's not like he's crying like a [chick].” Yeah. Good bar grub.

In a word: As you'd expect. The specs: #0471   Address, hours & details via Isthmus ; reviews at Yelp , ,  EatDrinkMadison ; official web site . Conor, JM, Katie, Natalie, Nichole, Peter Clark, and Tina ate the Hawaiian BBQ chicken, original sausage, and thin-crust mushroom pizzas. The bill was about $24 (thanks, Bucky Book !) Connor gave Papa John's Pizza an A-; Natalie gave Papa John's Pizza a B+; JM, Katie, Nichole, Peter Clark, and Tina gave Papa John's Pizza a B. Papa John's Pizza is good for feeding a group, and we were lucky enough to have one to feed this time. Everyone was decently satisfied. Connor was its biggest fan, mostly (it sounds like) because of happy memories, so true of all food. The sausage tasted pretty much like Brown and Serve, but in bite-sized morsels. The mushrooms went well on the thin crust, and the cheese and sauce were tasty but not, to put too fine a point on it, memorable. We appreciated the spicy banana pepper in each box – great for cutting grease and cleansing the palate – as well as the garlic dipping “”sauce”.” Turns out that more than one of us had independently discovered that the oil-and-flavoring mix makes a thrifty substitute for butter with a box of Kraft Mac & Cheese. Papa John's: Yup, standard take out pizza.

In a word: Good stuff at the right price. The specs: #0470   Address, hours & details via Isthmus ; reviews at Yelp , Isthmus , 43North89West ,  Eat Drink Madison listing ; official web site . JM ate the ribs with potatoes and coleslaw and a lemonade. Kristine ate the BBQ pork sandwich. Kyle ate the rib tips and sausage combo with home fries and an Orange Crush. Nichole ate the smoked chicken with corn and beans and a diet Pepsi. We split some peach cobbler. The bill was about $35. JM and Nichole gave Papa Bear's BBQ an A-; Kyle gave Papa Bear's BBQ a B+; Kristine gave Papa Bear's BBQ a B-. Papa Bear's BBQ stepped in where Bull's feared to tread. (Maybe it's a sign of the status of the market.) For a BBQ fix, you can't really go wrong here, though Bull's cheesy potatoes will be forever missed. The smoked chicken was very good and firm and moist. The ribs? Like candy. Candy! Made from meat! The corn-on-the-cob was big and slightly leathery in that not-unpleasant State Fair way. The coleslaw was peppery, the biscuit just fine. The home fries were acceptable filler, especially good for sopping up extra sauce, which is as plentiful as any good BBQ joints should be. Kristine's sandwich featured pork that was sliced and not pulled, which gave the amply sauced meat a slippery feel that wasn't entirely pleasant. Kyle scored what seemed to be the best of all possible worlds in a rib tip and sausage combo, despite the fact that he was one biscuit short of a full meal. The rib tips “walked the fine line between chewy and tender” though the ubiquitous cartilage bits presented a logistical challenge. Anyone who tried the hot link agreed it was probably the best item of all. The portion was generous – bigger than a brat – the meat was fine-ground and not too fatty, the casing had a nice snap, and flavor balanced the heat well. The peach cobbler used spices more commonly found with apples, but was OK. Kyle and Kristine observed improvement from their first visit, always a good sign. And we'd come back again anytime.

In a word: A little better than half a loaf. The specs: #0469  Address, hours & details via Isthmus ; reviews at Yelp , , EatDrinkMadison listing ; official web site and Madison community page . JM ate the broccoli cheese soup in a bread bowl. John ate the chicken bacon dijon sandwich with a fountain soda. John Sams ate the Fuji apple salad and an iced green tea. Nichole ate the grilled cheese and beef kids' meal with a coffee. Rose are the ham and swiss with a fountain soda. The bill was about $40. John Sams gave Panera a B+; JM, John, Nichole, and Rose gave Panera a B-. Panera is one of those chain speedy-service places that we can best appreciate when we're in a hurry, on the road, or looking for a place to hang out and study. It also seems to do a brisk business in the early-morning-bakery-for-the-office market. With the nearly identical Atlanta Bread Co. now off the radar in Madison, it will likely be even busier; while JM and Nichole tended to favor Panera over ABC for better pastries and coffee, we know plenty of people who felt the opposite. And truthfully, the differences are not huge. You can always get a decent salad, sandwich, or loaf of bread here. John's chicken bacon dijon sandwich was passable, but he wanted to point out that his choices were limited since so many of the menu items had one ingredient that was a turnoff to him, be it artichokes, black olives, or the like. The sourdough bread was not as tasty and zingy as he would have liked. Rose's ham and swiss was loaded with meat but short on cheese; we all bemoaned the pink, styrofoam tomato. Nichole's grilled roast beef and cheese sandwich hadn't been given quite enough time on the grill press to melt the cheese. On the other hand, it wasn't loaded with grease, and the yogurt “Tuberz” was a fun, if confounding, side for a grownup. Panera deserves some praise for offering better kids' meal options than most fast food restaurants – or even sitdown places, for that matter. John Sams' Fuji apple salad was well-balanced and satisfying, and had that hallmark can't-quite-name-it Panera flavor. JM liked his broccoli cheese soup in a bread bowl, though the difference between it and the same soup served in his office cafeteria was minimal. As for the beverages, Panera offers a wide array of coffee, tea, and blended drinks. The fountain soda choices are not as broad, particularly in the diet department. As chain dining in this price range goes, people seem to have more respect for Panera than, say, Arby's. With such good sandwich shops and bakeries across our fair city, it seems like Panera is a bit of an underwhelming choice. But if you bring in Panera for the office, we're not going to complain.

In a word: Inferior to its compadres. October 8 is Free Burrito Day , coincidentally. The specs: #0468

In a word: Seems pitched at a different demo. The specs: #0467  Address, hours & details via Isthmus ; reviews at EatDrinkMadison.com , Associated Content , Yelp , 77 Square ,  ; official web site . Brian from EatDrinkMadison.com ate the western crepe with a juice. JM ate the chocolate chip pancakes. Nichole ate the Monte Cristo with a coffee. The bill was $28 plus tip – thanks, EatDrinkMadison.com! JM gave Pancake Cafe a B-; Nichole gave Pancake Cafe a C+. Pancake Cafe is a small chain of popular breakfast places a step up from IHOP, along the lines of Original Pancake House . Our dining companion was Brian, the man behind EatDrinkMadison.com , a locally run online entertainment review site, so we had plenty of eating stories to swap over the complimentary coffee during the 25 minute wait for a table, and the additional half hour before our food arrived. To be fair, the place was utterly full – the crowd overwhelmed the smallish parking lot – but the bustle seemed to spill over to the point of frustration for our frazzled server. The menu included the usual pancakes, crepes, omelets, and combinations as well as a few sandwiches. Brian opted for a Western crepe with ham and vegetables, liberally dusted with paprika, and accompanied by potato pancakes that were more binding batter than potato. The chocolate chip pancakes were a little dry and there was simply not enough whipped cream.  Better to over-serve and scrape than under in this case. The pancake-iness of the dish was fine, though there was never anything to suggest that this signature item merited a closer look than the chocolate chip pancakes served at other diners in the area. The coffee was touted as “Kona” but no blend was mentioned. Pancake Cafe's  incarnation of the Monte Cristo used French toast around a slice each of American and Swiss cheese, some ham, and thick pieces of white meat turkey. The fowl didn't do the sandwich any favors on the moisture front, though some maple syrup helped. A side of “taffy apple salad” seemed pretty much straight out of Taste of Home magazine. Bottom line, Pancake Cafe is a crowd-pleaser, especially for the older and richer segments of the population, but not much jumps out as fabulous. For those who care to read on, what follows is an early exploration into constructing a grading rubric for the Monte Cristo sandwich. We welcome your feedback before any of this is set in stone. “Authenticity” as it relates to food finds some of its more vocal defenders among sandwich aficionados. Chicago-style hot dogs, cheesesteaks, and Italian beef all come to mind. Nichole's interest in such arguments up until now has been academic – or, more precisely, a matter of interest in the rules themselves and what degree of adherence is demanded for an item to fall under a given classification. With the Monte Cristo she is beginning to take on a yolk (with apologies to Hillel) in a great tradition of sandwich studies. One sandwich history explains the sandwich thus: The Monte Cristo Sandwich has creative variations from one restaurant to another. The basic sandwich is made of two slices of white bread with ham, turkey, or chicken, and a slice of cheese. It is then dipped in beaten egg and fried in butter. A classic Monte Cristo sandwich should come with a side of jelly to dip it in. The original grilled cheese sandwich, this consisted of Gruyere cheese and lean ham between two slices of crustless bread, fried in clarified butter. It was originally served in 1910 in a Paris cafe. This sandwich is still a popular snack or casual meal throughout France and Switzerland in most bars and cafes. This definition describes the full immersion version in which the entire assembled sandwich is battered and deep-fried. More common in Milwaukee and Madison is the version where egg-battered French toast is used for bread. Most use Swiss instead of Gruyere. There are other variations; some are open-faced . Some are obviously art projects . So what makes a perfect Monte Cristo, Milwaukee-style, for want of a better term? Bread: The French toast can be made from Texas toast or bread of standard thickness, but it should be moist inside and slightly crispy outside. The egg should impart flavor and heft but not overwhelm. Meat: The ham and turkey should be thin-sliced, deli-style, and preferably lightly grilled but definitely warm. Cheese: Swiss is the only option, and just enough to taste and bind the meats together. Construction/presentation: The flavors should be balanced, but at all costs, the Monte Cristo must not be so tall you can't get your mouth around it. Cutlery should not be necessary, though its use is the prerogative of the eater. Maple syrup should be provided. (Jam is already on the table at any venue worth its salt.) Finally, no kind of grilled cheese sandwich should ever be presented upended unless the chef properly anticipates and counteracts the very real and tragic possibility of all the cheese pooling onto one side of each piece. So, dear reader, help us define the perfect Midwestern Monte Cristo. And let us know where you think the best one in Madison can be found.

In a word: Crowd-pleasing in an odd way. The specs: #0466   Address, hours & details via Isthmus ;reviews at Yelp , Madison Dining Online , Isthmus , 77 Square ,  Favorite Places to Eat in Madison , ; official web site . Beckah ate the meatball sub with a white sangria. JM ate the beef ravioli with a Caesar salad and a lemonade. Nichole ate the spinach fettuccine in mushroom sauce with a Porto salad. Tiffany (and Clint, lucky recipient of planned leftovers) ate the sausage and banana pepper pizza with a white sangria. The bill was $76 plus tip. JM gave Paisan's an A-; Nichole gave Paisan's a B+. There's a quality of Paisan's we couldn't quite put a finger on. Like the upscale Food Fight venues, it's too spendy to be a comfort spot and not quite special enough to be a destination (but maybe that's our blind spot). Unlike many younger Madison venues, Paisan's is comfortable being itself, and we have to respect it for that. We sat on the patio and started off with cool, fruity sangria, an old-school bread basket, and salads. The trademarked Porta salad (named after Paisan's partner restaurant Porta Bella) is craveworthy: basically a cheese plate on a bed of lettuce. Shredded mozzarella and cheddar, salami, ham, and garbanzo beans are enough for a meal unto themselves, and need no dressing whatsoever. Now here was a meatball sub that commanded attention. It was a high maintenance sandwich the eating of which was fraught with the threat of drips from above. In the end, however, it just made Beckah happy. JM and Nichole's homemade pastas were fine. The red sauce was red, the noodles tender and fresh. There were plenty of mushrooms with the spinach fettuccine and the ravioli was hearty but somewhat forgettable. The deluxe pizza – sausage, banana peppers, and mushrooms on a thin crust – definitely outshone the pasta. In fact, it's Tiffany's standard order. The sausage was particularly good, being none too greasy yet full of spicy, fennel-seeded goodness. As we leaned back in our patio chairs, stuffed, Beckah related the story of how her parents had their first date at Paisan's, and how it has since become a family tradition. Looking around at the other patrons, we could easily imagine this being the case for many of them. The tablecloths outside are faded vinyl and more often than not held down by clothespins. The paneling inside is dark but not oppressive. There are still Andes candies for a coin at the register. It's these timeless qualities that make Paisan's so nice. Though the newer location traded a bit of history for a gorgeous view over the lake, Paisan's still has a good deal of charm.